Why i hopefully depression?

I am not confident as i should.
I am tired of trying to be more talkative, more confident.
I know we should not try to be something else, but i want to over come my unfriendly habit.
I do know that communication is important in everyone life.
I tried and still tried harder and harder.
Im sick of it now. Should i stop or find another way? I don't know 😢